Hace tiempo que le tenía ganas a escribir una reflexión sobre nuestras fiestas y su comparación con las de San Fermín. Evidentemente existen varios grados de similitud porque al fin y al cabo, las fiestas patronales en Navarra se nutren esencialmente de lo mismo: desde el atuendo blanquirrojo (mayormente adjetivado como “pamplonica”, mal que nos pese), pasando por la dimensión dionisíaca (el comer y beber como bestias, vamos, para que me entiendan) y terminando por la profusión de actos taurino-religiosos (los meto en el mismo saco, total, qué más da).
El caso es que una de las cosas que más me molesta es el desmesurado afán por definir los sanfermines como universales. Las veces que he estado yo allende las fronteras de España chapurreando mi limitado inglés y colocando a Tudela “near Pamplona, when the bulls run in the streets”. Y oigan, la mayoría de veces, y les aseguro que no porque mi inglés no se entendiese, mis interlocutores ponían cara de no saber qué era eso de los toros en las calles. Vale, que sí, que el rollo Heminway es muy way y eso, pero creo que se les llena más la boca a los PTV (pamploneses de toda la vida) de palabras sobre la universalidad de sus fiestas que de guiris con pedigrí las calles de su ciudad.
Y es que esa es otra. Hace poco me contaron una anécdota que pudo verse en una tele local estos sanfermines durante uno de esos programas que llenan las horas sanfermineras en los que un esforzado locutor o locutora se abre paso entre borrachos micrófono en mano tratando de pulsar la opinión de algún sobrio vestido de pamplonica. Un grupo de chicas se colocan delante de la cámara. La locutora les pregunta de dónde son. Ellas contestan que de Australia. La locutora exhala un “ooh, mm, sí, qué interesante”, hasta que una de las chicas le saca de su autocomplacencia y le espeta un “que nooo, que era broma, que somos de Ablitaaas” que deja a la locutora más desconcertada que Sara Carbonero después del beso de Casillas.
Esta anécdota ilustra la chulería de algunos con esto de los visitantes. Por supuesto, si son autralianos, americanos (del norte, of course), japos o jeques árabes todo está bien. Pero si son ecuatorianos o ablitenses, eso ya, bueno, pase, pero lo que mola son los visitantes del primer mundo que dejan petrodolares y no manchan las calles con botellones ni vasos de plástico.
Al menos en Tudela no presumimos de nada más que de darle un trago de Katxi al jipi noruego que se nos cruza en la calle. No somos universales, ni lo pretendemos. Eso sí, que nos dejen el día 24 en su sitio. Si es así, hasta le invitaremos una ronda al concejal.
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